Winter Olympics in Sochi, Russia 2014

The First Crocus 2014

Whilst this crocus was celebrating its arrival in my garden yesterday, the last preparations were being made for the Vladimir Putin Show Winter Olympics 2014.

Switzerland is a Winter Sport country, although this year the snow seems to have immigrated to the States. Vladimir Putin is hoping that it will also immigrate to Russia as the place he chose for his “I had a dream” concept is not really famous for constant snow. If you are lucky it will snow and if you are not lucky, then the Russian workers will have to move the snow from other parts of the country and cover the ski slopes manually. The area of Sochi is not well known for its constant snowfalls: more unpredictable weather situations. There is no need to worry, everything will be done, even if at the last minute, which is the general Russian philosophy.

The mayor of Sochi, Anatoly Pakhomov, has assured everyone that his town is ideal for the Winter Games. He has a lot of problems to solve, but no-one wants to disappoint Mr. Putin (or Russia for that matter) and no matter what, Sochi will be swamped in snow if necessary. It will definitely not be swamped in unwanted people dogs, they are suddenly disappearing from the streets, no longer to be seen, although I read it is only the unhealthy dogs that are being disposed of. No mention of stray cats, thank goodness. My three felines were worried when they read the reports.

There was a small problem, when building the various stadiums in Sochi, that a few houses slid down slopes, due to the dumping of building material for the stadiums. The inhabitants were told that their crumbling houses would be replaced. Unfortunately the authorities did not say when and how. A few families lived on the streets for a while, but were soon rehoused in one or two rooms. Perhaps not the same size and standard as it was originally, but we are sure Vladimir Putin will eventually supply these homeless people with suitable lodgings.

In the meanwhile let us be happy. I heard it was a fantastic opening ceremony (which seems to be more important than the actual games). It also seems that these games have cost more money than any others up to now. This is no problem: they will definitely remain in the memory of the Russian citizens, those that work for a handful of roubles, if they have a job.

I heard that some members of some of the Olympic teams taking part are having medical problems with the food, or was it the water. I am not sure, but the sportsmen have now been told not to drink the water from the tap, but rather buy it bottled – I wonder why.

My report on these games is not really to be taken seriously. I am not an authority and am not there, did not buy a ticket, and probably will not be watching on the television. I have something more interesting to do. I am not actually boycotting the whole thing, but I prefer to watch my crocus growing in the garden.

Daily Prompt: World’s Best Widget

You’ve been granted magical engineering skills, but you can only use them to build one gadget or machine. What do you build?

Photographers, artists, poets: show us MACHINES.

Tool School

I worked for almost thirty years in a Swiss machine tool manufacturing company, so this is a control system for one of the machines.

I have magical engineering skills! An end to the countless usage of foul words when something does not work.

Of course No. 1 on my list is the computer. How often do we wish that we had a Bill Gates look-alike at beck and call when the computer misunderstands our commands? Some say a computer never makes mistakes, I am sure this is just an excuse originating from Microsoft Incorporated to avoid lawsuits or damage claims when your computer is broken from a fall out of the window. You wait for endless hours outside an office building in a small town somewhere in Silicon Valley for the owner of the computer company to appear. You are armed with a Kalishnikov ready to shoot when he appears. You might have a city gentleman’s walking stick umbrella with a hidden syringe in the point ready to infect the computer inventor with a lethal poison. The perfect computer has not yet been invented. How often have we experienced a blue screen, a black screen or even no screen. This is definitely a market niche to be filled.

I was actually thinking about founding a social networking site where everyone could join. Friends would be made all over the world and a lot of money would be made as well (by me). People could let off steam when they felt they were mishandled by their respective boyfriend/girlfriend and everyone would hate and despise this person for treating his/her friend so despicably. You can swear, even send a few virus threads to people you do not like or even do not know – fun. You could tell everyone how much you really love your dog, cat, children, husband, wife, brothers and sisters. There would be an opportunity to take photos of your latest cake baking triumph for everyone to worship and admire in full RGB colours. Your grandchildren and newest baby additions to the family could be photographed and inserted in this social networking site. In twenty years the little babies of today would be really thankful that the whole world has seen them as a pacifier addicted little person. At least their mothers would still be happy, although their children might not be talking to them due to this reason.

Just a minute. What did you say? It has already been done. Some bloke called Mark Zuckerberg did it ten years ago and is still counting his millions from the misguided that joined. How could a bloke with a name like that invent such a serious thing – Sugar Mountain. On the other hand I suppose the name suits the target – a sweet, sugary dreamland visited by sweet sugary dreaming people.

Connecting to yesterday’s daily prompt (see golden oldies also have a short term memory, contrary to popular ideas), I heard a suggestion that a machine with just a button to press would be ideal for cleaning everything in the house. Not just washing dishes, but washing clothes, ironing clothes and putting them away neatly folded. It would also cook delightful five star menues. On the other hand that would be superfluous. This machine already exists. It is called “woman” and can even think and talk. Who needs a silent, brainless machine for the work. A “woman” entertains simultaneously. “Woman” adds her ideas, can complain and even praise if necessary.

To conclude this blog, Q.E.D. (quod erat demonstrandum meaning which had to be demonstrated) there is an invention, a solution to all problems,the world’s best widget, and it is called “woman”. Who said something about the apple? Forget it, if you bake a cake in the kitchen who takes a bite before invited – exactly.

Daily Prompt: World’s Best Widget

Widget Pingbacks

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