Daily Prompt: Tainted Love

Posted in Challenges by angloswiss

Ever been dumped by a boyfriend or girlfriend? Was it a total surprise, or something you saw coming? Tell us your best worst breakup story. Never been the dumpee, always the dumper? Relate the story of a friend who got unceremoniously kicked to the curb. Change the names to protect the innocent if you must.

Photographers, artists, poets: show us RELEASE.

Sky over Feldbrunnen

Only the names have been changed to protect the innocent, although I do not even remember the names and I am always innocent.

I had a stormy time in one of my relationships when my boyfriend was struck by lightning, or did I tell him to stand under the tree?

Enough said. It seems that the powers that be in the WordPress central are being very inquisitive. I am now approaching the platinum oldie age, the golden days are slowly slipping into the background, and I really cannot remember who, where and why and I am sure they cannot remember me either.

Of course I could tell them about my worst breakup story. The one where I discovered my boyfriend was going out with my best friend. I was found not guilty of attempted murder.. I did not really mean to hurt them, just two warning shots and the judge was convinced it was an accident. I did them both a favour, as they did not marry. I think she married a circus clown and he entered a monastery.

One of my ex-boyfriends was a millionaire. He was quite wealthy and he really seemed to like me, but he had had the irritating habit of eating garlic. I like garlic myself, but I know when to eat it and when not and definitely not when I was going out on a date. Unfortunately he could not swim. How was I to know that? Just after he had bought the engagement ring, genuine diamonds, he drowned, so I was on my own again. I managed to sell the ring for a few thousand and the coronary’s office reached the verdict of accidental death. There were no witnesses at the lake. I made sure we were on our own and I had a good lawyer.

As far as my real love life is concerned, I am happily married (since 46 years) and if Mr. Swiss blogged he would confirm this fact, but he does not blog (thank goodness).

This is a short episode today. I have just spent an hour in the garden with Mr. Swiss removing the memories of winter. When you become a golden oldie, your back tells you to stop and I have a pizza to make for the evening meal.

I am now looking forward to reading your stories of unrequited love and how you dealt with the situation. Perhaps you tried to push him under a train, from a bridge into a deep river, or put some arsenic in his soup – there are many ways. It might just have been a little argument and a bullet in the gun was accidentally fired. Anyhow I hope it is a real juicy breakup story, sort of “50 shades of how to dispose of your boyfriend and get away with it”.

Daily Prompt: Tainted love

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35 thoughts on “Daily Prompt: Tainted Love”

Marilyn Armstrong

22/02/2014 at 19:24

Did I tell you about the year I spent hooking in the bad side of Milwaukee? No? Never mind. There was NO way for you to know he couldn’t swim. You are INNOCENT. Completely innocent.

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- angloswiss
  
  22/02/2014 at 19:45
  
  Of course, it is just that I am sometimes misunderstood. Is the bad side of Milwaukee something like the Niederdorf in Zürich?
  
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  - Marilyn Armstrong
    
    22/02/2014 at 19:50
    
    Absolutely. All the bad areas of cities are identical. I have probably sold myself on the street corners of all of them. I am older than anyone knows. Even I don’t know.
    
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    - angloswiss
      
      22/02/2014 at 19:56
      
      I grew up in a bad area, where Jack The Ripper killed his victims in London. I think it was so bad that no-one noticed any more and now they earn money from the tourists.
      
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      - Marilyn Armstrong
        
        22/02/2014 at 20:07
        
        Isn’t Capitalism a wonderful thing? You can make money from absolutely everything!
        
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ranu802

22/02/2014 at 19:31

I happen to know about my friend,who was unceremoniously rejected by her lover.

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Rob's Surf Report

22/02/2014 at 19:34

That was a very humorous post, Mrs. Anglo-Swiss. I should award you a Surflitzer for that.

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- angloswiss
  
  22/02/2014 at 19:43
  
  Thanks. I accept – do I have to go surfing for it? (have no coastline in switzerland).
  
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  - Rob's Surf Report
    
    22/02/2014 at 23:37
    
    I do not think so; it’s intended to be wordplay, and besides – I can’t expect everyone to be a surfing enthusiast!
    
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Maggie Wilson

22/02/2014 at 22:38

Did someone say pizza?

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Martha Kennedy

22/02/2014 at 22:54

Shades of breakup, 56: When I first read the prompt, I gave some thought to how I disposed of the recent (and ultimate) live in boyfriend/husband but somehow on this beautiful morning I just didn’t feel like writing, “I hate you. I wish you were dead. Get the f… out of my house!” I didn’t feel like writing about my bewilderment over the fact that he STAYED for four more hours because he didn’t believe me. I, however, felt no need to talk to him further during that twilight interval since, in my private universe, he was dead. I actually GAVE him a car just to get him away from me. 😀

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Marissa Bergen

23/02/2014 at 02:51

I think Paul Simon did that one…’50 Ways to Leave Your Lover’. Anyway, thanks again for the pingback!

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- angloswiss
  
  23/02/2014 at 09:05
  
  I remember tnat one, and now the tune is going around in my head.
  
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wscottling

23/02/2014 at 03:18

I have a book in my room about poisons. It’s for writers. I have a lot of books on interesting ways to kill people that are written for writers. That and my addiction to reality crime TV makes me believe that my husband needs to die of old age, in his sleep, or surrounded by witnesses in a hospital room. ^_^

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- angloswiss
  
  23/02/2014 at 09:08
  
  Living in the middle of Europe we get the reality crime from many countries Sounds like an interesting book collection you have
  
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  - wscottling
    
    23/02/2014 at 10:25
    
    I had aspirations to be a writer once upon a time…
    
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    - angloswiss
      
      23/02/2014 at 13:45
      
      I still do, problem being I am too lazy to write more than a blog
      
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belle.beckford

23/02/2014 at 06:57

Absolutely great story!!

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