28 | December | 2013 | Chronicles of an Anglo Swiss

You’ve just won $1 billion dollars in the local lottery. You do not have to pay tax on your winnings. How will you spend the money?

Photographers, artists, poets: show us RICH.

My bank, but not my bicycle, nor is that my car you can see. I cannot ride a bicycle and with so much money I no longer need to learn. Even the car would be a size too small, and who wants a car, I want a chauffeur and a car. It is a nice bank, I know most of the clerks, being a small town and living in a small village next to the town. When I arrive I take a numbered ticket from a machine and wait until the number lights up on a screen telling me which window I can visit. Our Swiss banks are very well organised and very clean of course. There is not a bank note to be seen. That is all kept in a secret place where the gnomes live and only appears by means of an electronically propelled tube where the bank notes arrive, neatly folded when required. Who needs money today, it is all done by computer and credit cards. Probably I took this photo after arriving in town on the local train, but now that has all come to an end.

I must make a small correction. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is tax free in Switzerland. The gnomes who live in the Bahnhofstrasse in Zürich decided that is a big no in Switzerland. Of course if you are an Arab prince, a foreign King or a member of a government somewhere in the world, you would get away with a numbered bank account meaning no-one knows you have it. Basically “nobody can find out you are the owner of your account. Information about the account is only disclosed if a Swiss judge is presented with information that your account was used for serious illegal activities, such as drug traffic or arms dealing. For an extra fee charged by the bank anually you can even obtain a numbered account, where the only information used in transactions to and from the account is a number, secret agent-style”. OK I got that bit from Internet. We have a bank secret although there are countries in the world that do not like this and are trying to prevent us from keeping secrets. Where would the Swiss be without their bank secrets? It would be like preventing MacDonalds from selling hamburgers..

Would I do such a thing? Of course. I would have to check with Mr. Swiss that our transactions in connection with drugs and gun running are in a secret place, so otherwise it is all systems go.

Spending the money is another problem. I think I would just let it lay in my little gnome account and gather some interest. As a golden oldie I no longer work for my living, I live off the Swiss state in the shape of a pension. Even the British state sends me a little contribution.

I did have a strong feeling that I had already told WordPress what I would do if I was rich. They probably did not believe me, so asked again, or perhaps they lost my priceless blog contribution in the archives. No wonder my talent has still not been recognised.

So now you are all poised and wondering what Mrs. Angloswiss will do with this new found wealth when she picks it up at the bank. I think I would employ someone to write my daily prompts, perhaps the lady that wrote 50 Shades of …… I am sure she would increase my followers and likes. That being taken care of I would move to an island, yes the Cayman Islands, keeping an eye on my wealth. I would build two villas, one for Mr. Swiss and I and one for the felines, paw friendly of course. I could then do what I want to all day long. No cleaning, no washing, no ironing, no cooking. Just count my money, lie in the sun and swim in my pool.

You know what, when I think about it, life would be really boring. Let’s forget it and WordPress do not bring this one again next year, I am running out of ideas.

Daily Prompt: You’re a Winner!

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