Remember the seven cardinal sins? You’re given the serious task of adding a new one to the list — another trait or behavior you find particularly unacceptable, for whatever reason. What’s sin #8 for you? Why?
I was never an ace at firework photos, probably because I am too lazy to carry my tripod everywhere I go with the camera, but even this amateur presentation shows the explosive nature of the whole thing. Actually I am supposed to invent a new eighth deadly sin, although I must admit without having the link from the man in the WordPress t-shirt I would not even know what they were. Just a moment, I remember a film called “Seven” with Morgan Freeman and Brad Pitt about some serial killer that decided to kill people according to the seven deadly sins. Unfortunately I only really had eyes for Brad Pitt, and do not exactly remember what the sinful bit was, although there was quite a lot of blood and sadism.
“Tabby, did you want to say something?” My Tabby feline is waving her paw in the air and probably wants to correct my previous statement, as usual.
“Yes Mrs. Human I do. Where was I yesterday evening? Think about it.”
“You were at home, although I was surprised. You are usually exploring the landscape on the search for a poor unsuspecting mouse to devour.”
“And why was I at home and where did I spend most of the evening?”
“Yes, I remember I opened the window to let you out, and you immediately decided to stay and disappeared under the settee in the spare room.”
“Mrs. Human I was ready to take my usual evening walk and as you opened the window there was a bang: a loud bang, followed by more loud bangs.”
“Ah yes, the Swiss nation is celebrating its national day on 1st August with firework displays. They are very pretty. We also light fires on the mountains and the children have processions with their pretty patriotic lanterns.”
“I know all that Mrs. Human, but yesterday was not the 1st August.”
“I know Tabby, people cannot wait and the celebrations begin every year earlier.”
“So what about us felines. It is not fun to be followed by ear splitting explosions. When the humans say “aaah” and “oooh” we cats hide and say “MEOW”. We do not like loud unexpected noises. My cousin in the States hates 4th July, my friends in France dislike 14th July and the 5th November is one big cat problem in England. You can add 1st August to the list.”
“OK, Tabby, this evening I will stay at home and hold your paw whilst you are quivering from the fireworks.”
“And something else: tell the guys in the WordPress t-shirts that the eighth sin will be NOISE. You humans are far too noisy. If you have a problem you shout, if you have a war you let bombs and missiles explode. It seems to be the only way you solve anything. We felines might have our territorial problems, but we solve it with a hiss and meow and an aimed swipe of the paw. Afterwards we retreat and go each other out of the way. And Mrs. Human, forget Brad Pitt. He was paid for the role in the film and it was all make-believe in any case.”
So it seems again the felines know what they are talking about. As I am writing this piece outside on the porch it sounds like world war three has broken out. There are explosions everywhere. I will also be glad when 2nd August arrives. I will probably be picking up the remains of burnt out rockets in my garden.