Daily Prompt: Delayed Contact – Meet Son of Fred Junior – Cyril the new spider in the kitchen.

How would you get along with your sibling(s), parent(s), or any other person you’ve known for a long time — if you only met them for the first time today?

Spider in the kitchen

“Hello Fred, nice to see you have returned to my kitchen corner.”

“Fred, no, Fred was my grandfather. My dad was Fred Junior and now it’s time to introduce a new name in the family. I am Cyril, son of Fred Junior. Where shall I start Mrs. Angloswiss. Dad said to just hover around and wait for something interesting to land in the web. I must say you seem to have quite a lot of flies this year.”

“Oh yes I do Cyril, they are everywhere, especially in the morning when I eat my breakfast in the kitchen. They never seem to fly into your web. Do you think you might be doing something wrong Cyril.”

“I am hovering and waiting Mrs. Angloswiss. We are not hunters. We are not equipped with fly swotting hands at the tips of our legs. We are the patient kind. If a fly happens to get lost on its flight he will be caught in my web. It is then we pounce and make a lunch packet for later digestion. We indoor spiders are more into the smaller kind of flying insect. Fruit flies are welcome, but you have no fruit.”

“I keep the fruit outside in the summer Cyril, otherwise the fruit bowl is full of flies.”

“You see Mrs. Angloswiss, that is why I am so thin. You are starving me of my rightful food. Oh, just a minute, yes got him.”

“What was that?”

“One of the mini flies just entered my web.”

“You mean that dark speck in your web. I can hardly see it.”

“Mrs. Angloswiss you do not have to see all the flies. As long as we can absorb them, it suffices. And there goes another one.”

“I don’t see it.”

“But I do. If you want one of the big game hunters, you have to go outside. I saw that Jeremy has made a nice nest this morning, although he said he spun the original web yesterday and it was washed away in the evening. Be careful where you aim your hose Mrs. Angloswiss.”

“I didn’t see Jeremy. I was just giving the garden a good soak.”

“All very well, but be careful where you soak. Jeremy spent hours weaving his web and it was all gone in less than a minute. Look where you spread the water Mrs. Angloswiss. No consideration from the humans. We are only doing our job.”

“But some of us do not like spiders Cyril. My blogging colleague Marilyn …….”

“We know all about Marilyn Mrs. Angloswissl She is notorious in the spider world. Some of us spiders do not like humans Mrs. Angloswiss, but we have to live with them.”

“Well, I did look after your granddad and daddy over the years. They were very helpful in keeping the other insects away, except for the flies.”

“Glad to hear it Mrs. Angloswiss. My daddy told me that if you want a safe and comfortable place during the summer, then hang around in Mrs. Angloswiss kitchen. She says where there is a spider there is a home. Now go and take a photo of Jeremy, I am sure he would appreciate being shown to all the nice bloggers (except Marilyn), but be careful where you tread. I think Mabel may be in the garden.”

“Who is Mabel?”

“That’s Jeremy’s wife. Jeremy said she is transporting her egg sack at the moment and we don’t want to destroy Jeremy’s next generation, now do we.”

So here is a photo of Jeremy with his lunch next to him in the web. I did not see Mabel, but I think she was busy with the family protection plan.

Garden spider

Daily Prompt: Delayed Contact – Meet Son of Fred Junior – Cyril the new Spider in the Kitchen

Daily Prompt: Delayed Contact – A picture book family

How would you get along with your sibling(s), parent(s), or any other person you’ve known for a long time — if you only met them for the first time today?

Dead Rose

I could tell you all about Uncle Nick. Now if you met him for the first time, you would probably run and hide. He did have the habit of flying around on full moon nights wearing a long black cloak and sharpening his teeth on a file. The teeth were very pointed and I am sure he could have bitten through a tree trunk if necessary. However, he only used them for jugular veins on the necks of various animals or people and they often made blood stains on his white shirt. Not that it bothered him, he just continued as usual. I suppose it is as they say, you can pick your friends, but not your family.

He would work at the local blood bank on the night shift. He slept most of the day, although when the days got shorter in Winter he had a twilight hour job helping the local undertaker. Getting along with Uncle Nick was an overstatement. He was a quiet person, did not mix very much and liked to keep himself to himself. His wife Aunty Dementia was a wonderful person. I remember she always took her broomstick with her when she went shopping. She had a thing for cleanliness. She said it was quicker than the bus or train. Both Uncle Nick and Aunty Dementia are no longer with us in body, but they left their cat, Boris in my care. He loves to go for a walk in the evening and I often accompany him on an excursion to the nearby cemetery. It is almost as if he senses where the remains of Nick and Dementia lay. Unfortunately some nights the grave is empty as they seem to have a wandering spirit.

If you ever meet Boris I would not advise to pat him on the head or stroke his long black fur. He is very sensitive to human touch and it might be that he turns his head and sinks his fangs teeth into your hand. If he draws blood do not worry He has a long sharp tongue and will gladly lick it up for you. Yes that was an unforgettable family.

“Get down Boris and stop annoying that rat in the corner. Ah, you are hungry. Here is a nice bloody steak. Boris do not just bite meat and swallow it, chew it first of all. It will be much easier to digest. Ah, that is not necessary, is slides down nicely in lumps.”

I cannot remember the first time I met that happy family, they were always there and never really left us.

Of course, there was cousin Smokey. He was the son of Nick and Dementia. I think Nick was disappointed in him as he did not seem to live up to the family tradition. He worked for the local fire brigade. He loved things that went up in smoke and if there was no fire he always seemed to find something to burn. He hated school, but he was a lucky cousin. The school burnt down and he had only been there a few weeks. Of course he was under suspicion because someone saw him with a magnifying glass holding it in the sun’s rays over the wooden school door. When questioned he said he was practicing spontaneous combustion for his chemistry lesson at school so no further investigations were carried out.

Smokey had a brother. He had a nickname and was known as “The Strangler”. We do not talk about him. He managed to escape from prison and was last heard of somewhere in Eastern Europe. He seemed to be the black sheep of the family.

So, that will do. Speaking about family members or friends that I have known for a long time is a personal thing and I am sure they would not like to know that I am giving their private details all over Internet. Nick’s family are an exception. They did not really have any friends and most of their relations disowned them. “Boris, down boy, I have a nice piece of liver for you for lunch, but avoid making blood stains on your fur, it does not make a good impression.

Daily Prompt: Delayed Contact – A Picture Book family