FOWC with Fandango: Creepy

Another one of my “creepy” stories from the past. Enjoy.

Cow

Letter to the Accident Insurance

Dear Sirs,

It was a bright crisp morning as I left my home. It was so bright that I had to wear my sun glasses. the sun’s reflection was blinding my sight and I had to grope my way over the road. There was a sound of crunching as I stepped onto the crispiness of the morning, the temperatures being below freezing point. You are perhaps thinking, why does Mrs. Angloswiss take such chances. Perhaps it would have been better if I had stayed at home, but I was on a mission. I was charged to follow the words of the WordPress daily prompt. Who are WordPress you are asking and why was this so important? There are certain things in life that cannot be explained. If WordPress calls, you answer and do not ask questions.

To continue: the next trial was upon me, my mobile phone began to ring. I have a rather loud “RING RING” sound on my phone as my hearing is no longer as good as it was, and it is important that my calls are answered. It might be that the Pulitzer people are calling to inform me of my prize winning blog. However, this time it was a call from my faithful and trusty WordPress helper, Wordy.

“Hello Wordy, I am on my way on a WordPress job, so I do not have a lot of time.”

I told him on the mobile phone. Wordy then spoke, no screamed, into the phone saying

“Mrs. Angloswiss, go home, this is a hoax, your life is in danger.”

I was startled, I froze (it was cold).

“Don’t freeze Mrs. Angloswiss, move immediately, they are here.”

At this moment I heard the screeching of tyres on the crispy road surface and I turned my head to see a speeding car approaching. The driver had a death defying glance in his red rimmed eyes and the last I saw was his black t-shirt with the words “Wordpress daily Prompt Trio No. 4” in red dripping letters – was it blood? I had no time to decipher the meaning of this action. Yes the car hit me with the full force of its weight and speed and I spun into the air. My complete life of successful blogs flew before my eyes and I screamed.

I awoke in a hospital bed, surrounded by Mr. Swiss and Wordy and I smelt, no stunk. I must have been lucky. The devil driver of WordPress Daily Prompt Trio No. 4 hit me with such a force that I was torpedoed into the air and arrived on a pile of cow manure which was a soft, although rather smelly, landing place. This broke the fall, and luckily I only had bruises and a few torn ligaments, which in time would heal. Of course the hospital staff were unsure whether I was bruised or whether they were stains from the cow dung which had deposited itself on my body.

I saw Wordy was concerned.

“I tried to warn you Mrs. Angloswiss, but it was too late. Negative forces within the organisation planned to jeopardise todays prompt and decided that an attack on our star blogger would bring the biggest impact. You could have been killed.”

“Yes Wordy, luckily there was a pile of cow recycled matter to break my fall.”

“When I heard your scream through the telephone I organised my Wordy group and told them to grab the softest material they could find. We used warp speed and succeeded in building a layer of cow dung.”

“Thank you Wordy, but hay might have smelt better.”

“It was the wrong time of the year for hay, but there is always a fresh supply of nice soft cow dung on the fields.”

Mr. Swiss was looking concerned and told me that I could have swopped the theme of the daily prompt for a good joke. Unfortunately Mr. Swiss did not know any good jokes and with my luck I might have choked when laughing at the joke.

As you can see, Mr. Insurance manager, this was a chain of unforeseen circumstances, out of my control. I would be grateful if you could examine the matter closer and meet any hospital expenses incurred by this unfortunate accident. All legal costs will be covered by my WordPress insurance – do I have one.?

Yours faithfully

Angloswiss, Blogger of the year

FOWC with Fandango: Creepy

RDP Thursday: Sham

Shamrock 12.09 (2)

A shamrock is not a rock
It does not even try
I call myself an Angloswiss
But my German is just standbye
50 years ago
I met the man of my life
On the day that we  got married
I became a very Swiss wife
My Rösti is quite perfect
I see the alps every day
Although I have never climbed one
The summit too far away
Deep down I am still a Brit
Although I pay in francs
I will no longer return to England
Stay faithful to the Swiss Banks

RDP Thursday: Sham

Good Morning

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I needed something to brighten up he morning. It began with removing duvet and cushion covers from the bed linen. Yes, the time for fresh linen is here again, the problem being that it is all double the work as there are two beds. And so I afterwards ventured into the garden to have a pickup and see what is happening outside. I found this colourful mixture quite good.

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I even treated myself to one of these yesterday. I saw them as a new arrival in the store a couple of days ago and discovered that are called kalanchoe thyrsifolia. They are also known as flap jacks. Any relation of kalanchoe with its wonderful small flowers is a friend of mine.

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However they do not all look like this, and the new species I have bought is a bit different. It seems they do flower, once in their life, with a stalk reaching 2-3 meters and some white flowers. After this exhaustion, the plant will die, but leaving a few new baby plants to continue the race. As these are generally at home in the African countries I do not expect mine will flower. It needs almost no water and some sun, so another curiosity in the garden. During the Winter I will have to take it inside.

I also noticed yesterday that my parsley is coming to an end, determined to now produce flowers, and no longer with any leaves for cooking, so I bought myself a new parsley to last until Winter.  When I planted it I noticed a few small centepedes said hello in the earth. they were black and a species I had never seen before: only two or three of them. Amazing what you find sometimes.

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I noticed I also had quite a buzzy noise on my buddleia. After the rain we had been having I noticed the bees were out to enjoy what the buddleia had to offer.

I was actually on a shopping trip to the store yesterday to get a few edible items to ensure we do not starve until Friday. There was a special offer on spiced salmon and I decided that would make a change from the usual cold cuts in the evening. Served on toast with some horseradish sauce it would be quite tasty. Evening meals are sometimes so monotonous. Mr. Swiss made the suggestion yesterday for a Russian salad now and again. You can buy it ready made from the tin, but I though I might have a go myself. Just cooking some diced cubes of potato, carrot, perhaps beans and definitely peas is no big job and afterwards mixed in a salad sauce.  He was right, it would make a change.

And now to make up for lost time, continue the bed making session and otherwise generally making order everywhere.

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i had to tie up my white roses this morning as they were hanging down with the weight of the rain drops. Although a fresh rain is good for the roses, but the petals begin to show signs of becoming brown. Today I will be busy at home dealing with bed linen and other work. If I have the time I might take a wheelie in my chair this afternoon with the camera, but not so far. I was thinking to the local cemetery and castle.

In the meanwhile enjoy the day and ignore the bad parts. We all have them now and again. See you on the flip side.