I just had to write this one while it is still fresh in my mind. Mr. Swiss is still laughing at my strange sense of humour.
You know we all get them, those telephone calls from a call center. I mean you really have to have pity on the guys and gals that do this for a living. They probably cannot find anything better, and their wage depends on how much they sell. It is ruthless and probably they are spurred on by a boss that makes hit lists of the best, the not so good and the failures – what a life. They also speak with some sort of foreign accent. The speak german, I understand it, but I can even speak it better than they can.
Anyhow in Switzerland it is the thing to call a random number and tell the victim who takes the call (me for example), that I must be aware that the sickness insurance is again subject ot a price increase. Of course it is, we know it is, every year we pay more for the same service, because everyone gets ill at some time and costs are exploding in medicine and care, this is nothing new.
So today, Mrs. Angloswiss gets another one of these calls. The last call was a couple of days ago. Mr. Swiss once told me that no-one is really interested in selling me a new insurance, because I am too old. I have now found enjoyment on these calls, I now have the ultimate answer.
So my mobile rings. First of all there is a few seconds of silence. It is then you know it is one of those calls. There is always silence at the beginning. Perhaps they are nervous, or perhaps their headphones have a fault. Then the call begins with a good evening or whatever.
“You realise that the sickness insurances are increasing in price.”
I am alert, but stifle my laugh.
“We have a solution to the price increase.”
It is then I can say my words “you do realise I am 70 years old and at my age I really do not think I need a new insurance, or that you really want to sell me one.”
“In that case have a nice day.” and the conversation ends – I can hear the disappointment in his voice.
That’s the way to do it. Mr. Swiss was listening and found that I have a sort of sadistic enjoyment in talking to these people. Mr. Swiss just hangs the telephone up. I find it does not cost anything to be sociable, and after all now that guy at the call centre has something to tell his colleagues and perhaps not to call my number in future. Although a shame really, I am really now getting an appetite for these calls and it breaks up the boredom in life. You really just have to look on the funny side of life – all part of the wonderful english black humour.