…When all you need is a knife might not be ironic, but it is unfortunate. Add your own verse, stanza, or story of badly-timed annoyance to Alanis Morissette’s classic:
I have no idea of classics by Alanis Morissette. I only know that she is a singer but definitely not my sort of thing. I have never heard of an ironic song about 10,000 spoons. Ironic is that I am supposed to write a daily prompt about this song and even add my own verse or story. The only help I have is a link to a Wikipedia site, not even the lyrics: I had to find them myself. Of course, I could have searched for a YouTube video, but it is common knowledge that Mrs. Angloswiss avoids YouTube videos on her blog when possible. I am even allergic to blog sites with music in the background. I know, I am a miserable cow sometimes, but I do have my good side (I think). A badly-timed annoyance is that the t-shirted WordPress robots invent a prompt that is absolutely not in the line with an Angloswiss prize suspicious unique blog.
“Mrs. Human, stay cool.” My feline Tabby is shaking her head. “What is the fuss about? We felines live in ironic circumstances daily. We were once worshipped as Gods, and today we have to wait until our dish is filled by a subordinate human. Ironic is the fact that we have paws and not hands with fingers. Then the humans would be superfluous. If we had 10,000 spoons it would not help.”
“OK Tabby, point taken, but you are a well fed feline. Sometimes I have a feeling that you are a little too well fed. A bowl of delicious vitamin packed pellets always full and at your disposal when you are hungry. Some felines only have their food served twice a day.”
“Oh yummy Mrs. Human. I love dry brown pieces of unidentifiable food to munch: a real high point of the day.”
“Now don’t get ironic with me Tabby, otherwise your tuna fish ration is in danger.”
“Who is being ironic now Mrs. Human. Where is the tuna fish, I see no tuna fish.”
“It is in the cupboard and I will take out a tin for you this evening, if you are a good feline.”
“Here we go again. Felines are not good or bad, we don’t do adjectives. We exist, therefore we are in the words of the great philosopher Descartes Desi Cats “je pense, donc je suis”, he miawed in French. As far as I am concerned you can put the tins next to my dish. Don’t worry Mrs. Human, I will not eat the tuna fish before you open the tin and serve it.”
“I hope not. Too much tuna fish is not good for you.”
“Who says that? Of course it is good for me, but an ironical problem is involved.”
“And that would be?”
“Imagine you are walking in the desert. You are thirsty and have a bottle of mineral water in your rucksack. The sun is beating down, you are perspiring. What do you do?”
“No problem, Tabby, I open the rucksack and drink the mineral water.”
“I havn’t finished. You have forgotten the bottle opener. It is a glass bottle.”
“I can knock the bottle on a hard object to break it and then I am saved.”
“There are no hard objects in a desert, just sand.”
“OK, you have got me, an ironic situation.”
“So to continue Mrs. Human: I have ten tins of tuna fish and no tin opener.”
“I will give you a tin opener.”
“Typical stupid human: and how am I going to open the tin? Tin openers are not constructed for paws. That is an ironic situation, surrounded by tuna fish and no possibility to eat it. So I am left to my frugal ration of vitamin packed pellets, big deal.”
Tabby has now proved her point. Felines are always one step ahead. Who needs 10,000 spoons, a tin of tuna fish and a tin opener when you have no way of holiding a tin opener to open the tin and cats do not use spoons. What a stupid, pointless, dead ended prompt this is.
“Come Tabby, I will open a tin of tuna fish for you; forget the expensive vitamin packed pellet food. Let’s have a party and I will make a tuna fish salad for myself. Let us share the irony of this ironic prompt.”
“At last a good idea from a human brain, a rare occurrence, almost ironic” was Tabby’s last thought on the matter.
Daily Prompt: 10,000 Spoons – Ironic that I have never heard of this song
Chronicles of an Anglo Swiss 
I never heard of Alani Morisette or the “classic” 10,000 spoons. So I just added my post and a comment that I think it’s time for Ben Huberman, a man who doesn’t understand his job or the people he supposedly serves, to move on to other pastures. Like pastures where he doesn’t have to deal with people at all. Perhaps pastures full of cows to whom he can talk until it’s time for them to come home.
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If we didn’t have Ben we would have nothing to complain about, and we both know that complaining is a prerogative of golden oldies, otherwise we would be bored. We are syncronised. Every day I check through the other blogs and every day after I have passed my comment on yours I return to my blog to find your comment. Totally eerie
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I think it’s called “a relationship.” Actually, given the “improvement” WordPress is making, there’s plenty to complain about. I spent almost all day yesterday complaining, for all the good it did. You might want to hold off on that tee shirt a little while longer.
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Just had a peep at the YouTube video and after half a minute, turned it off. I had not missed anything world shaking and didn’t understand half of what she was singing. I am too old for this sort of thing.
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I asked Garry if he had heard of her. He said “What? Can you repeat that?” I did. He still didn’t know what I was talking about. I said it was a song, apparently very popular at some point or other. He went back to answering his email. Now THAT’S irony.
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Your pragmatic feline’s argument reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode I saw as a young teenager. The main character is a bookish man, who is always trying to escape the world, to read in solitude and peace. One day, an H-bomb drops while he is in the vault of the bank where he worked. Realizing there were no more people, and his dream for peace and solitude to read in could finally come true, he decides to make his way to his library. On the way, he stumbles on rubble and breaks his glasses. Oh, the tragedy! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time_Enough_at_Last
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As an eyeglass wearer, that has always been my favorite Twilight Zone episode. Garry’s too.
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Same here! It terrified me as a teenager, though!
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Must try and find that one in YouTube if it is there. Sounds super ironic
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I did wonder how many bloggers hadn’t even heard *of* the song, let alone knew it as well as I do, having been a teenager when it came out. I’d have been lost myself if he’d chosen a song from the past ten years.
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I may be giving Ms. Morissette (born 200 km from me when I was in grade 11) and her co-author too much credit, but there _is_ irony in the song. It’s just subtle. People look for irony in the ‘examples’ given in the lyrics.The ‘examples’ aren’t ironic — a thousand stand-up comedians have done rants about that fact. The thing is, they aren’t meant to _be_ ironic; they’re meant to _look_ ironic — but only if you don’t look too closely. The irony lies in the fact that, in a song called ‘Ironic’, there is no irony.
And now I’m reminded of Spider Robinson.
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I would not dispute it. My problem would be that I did not know the song, I had never heard it and In the short time I got to know it, I was not equipped to made a statement about it, but they are daily prompts, with emphasis on the prompt. I can even get prompted by my evening meal.
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it’s a decent album. well, i think it is, but i have a particular fondness for music by angry female singers. not everyone’s cup of tea, of course.
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I’ve heard the song. Oh, how many times have I heard the song! I had daughters you see… but I’d hardly call it a “classic” other than quite a few people loved to tease her about her use of the word ironic.
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I had sons. One is a 200% Rolling Stones/Beatles and anything else that originated in the sixties and the other discovered Nirvana before anyone else in Switzerland I think. No Allanis Morisette fans here.I had heard of her but that was all.
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Angloswiss,
Enjoyed your writing as usual. The way you talk to your cat is wonderful and the way your cat talks to you is even funnier. Tuna used to be my cat’s favourite food too until I read somewhere that it contains too much salt which is not probably good for cats. So its back to cat food once more. On the negative I have seven hungry cats outside mewing continuously, under the notion that their mummy (me) is angry with them and has not fed them enough. Little do they know that their mummy is on a ration herself.
Thank you anyway. Please think of putting all your wonderful writings into a book, so all of us fans can read. It will make a good ” miserable day” read.
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lol. its a bad song anyway 🙂
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