Daily Prompt: Odd Trio Redux – or why are flip-flops not designed for my feet

Time for another Odd Trio prompt: write a post about any topic you want, in whatever form or genre, but make sure it features a slice of cake, a pair of flip-flops, and someone old and wise.

Flipflops

Whoever designed feet as a termination to the body was misguided and probably had a dream that the human form would be perfect. I do not agree. I find feet are a bad finishing job, at least mine. I was never happy about my feet and in my younger days would do my best to hide them from the general view. As the years go by, feet are only important if they still carry you and do not fail so who cares what they look like as long as they do their job. I gave up painting my toe nails some time ago because I had problems reaching the toes.

Based on this brilliant reasoning I was shopping and saw them displayed. I had tried flip-flops many years ago but forgot why, how and when. This time it was different: they were colourful and studded with imitation jewels and appealed to my strange taste, but did they suit my feet? I took my courage in my feet hands and entered the shoe selling emporium. With a trembling voice I asked the assistant if they existed in size 43. I was in luck. Either people have bigger feet today and the size is common, or they were catering for abnormal feet. I tried them, although I wondered why. Just two straps and a sole – what could possibly go wrong?

I took a few steps in the shop with no problem and admired the foot result in the mirror. The price was right.

“I will take them.”

The assistant looked at me with a curious expression.

“Have you worn flip-flops before?”

“I think so, some forty years ago.”

“I just wanted to mention that they are not so easy at the beginning. We have had customers that only wore them for a day and no longer as they had problems walking.”

I was about to ask if there was a course I could visit: sort of “How to walk with Flip-Flops” but decided to remain silent. I have problems with my feet without flip-flops, so it could only get better. I took the plunge and bought my dream flip-flops.

I arrived home and immediately put them on my individually designed feet. I walked to the kitchen and stood in my flip-flops. Mr. Swiss gave his approval on the design, so that problem was resolved. The next problem was actually wearing them: my flip-flops also existed for a day. Since this memorable day they have a firm position in my bedroom next to my comfortable daily walking slippers and have never been worn again. I believe Julius Ceaser and his groupies lived with flip-flops in a sort of Roman leather thongy way. I never read that he had problems with the foot space between the largest toe and its neighbour. I really do not think that he had a developing soreness that prevented a normal flip-flop walk. I blame it on the body termination. The bloke that designed the human body got it all wrong. He was probably tired when he arrived at the feet and passed it on to the computer and this was the result. Frogs, cats and birds do not have this problem, but I suppose they do not wear flip-flops.

They are just not suitable for an old and wise person as myself. Did you ever see a photo of Albert Einstein wearing flip-flops and he was old and wise. I only remember the photo where he stuck his tongue out, a sort of Rolling Stone icon. Perhaps he was sticking his tongue out in agony because his wife had given him a pair of flip-flops for his birthday. He then had a brainwave and told us all what energy was E=MC2 meaning do not even try it when wearing flip-flops, the energy disappears. The actual equation would have been E=MC2Flip-Flop.

Not only am I allergic to Daily Prompts that are not Prompts, but dislike inventions of the man in the WordPress t-shirt who had a dream. “Let them eat cake”, although when Marie Antoinette said that she was not wearing a WordPress t-shirt and she lost her head eventually. I rarely eat cake because these days I am too busy writing Daily Prompts to bake one. However there are other methods. I bought some ready-made caramel flans in the local supermarket. I know I usually like to do-it-myself, but in Summer I do not have time. I placed it in a suitable glass dish and garnished it with whipped cream from the aerosol can. The result was just as good as a cake and there were no crumbs to fall into my computer keyboard.

Have a nice Sunday, see you tomorrow with a story about fire ants, slugs and how to kill the gardener that removed two ant nests when renewing my garden. Yes, life at the Angloswiss villa can be quite exciting. And now to my caramel flan.

Karamelköpfli

Daily Prompt: Odd Trio Redux – or why are flip-flops not designed for my feet

20 thoughts on “Daily Prompt: Odd Trio Redux – or why are flip-flops not designed for my feet

  1. Pingback: Daily Prompt: Odd Trio Redux | tnkerr-Writing Prompts and Practice

  2. I have found VERY few flip flops that are comfortable. I can totally relate! I will take straight out sandals any day.

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  3. As one who lives in a place where flip-floppiness (that FLAP-FLAP-FLAP sound they make while one walks in them) is essential white noise, I’ve found them kind of weirdly comforting. Not comfortable, mind you, but comforting. They’re not complicated, for one, and should you choose to paint your toenails, the big toe and the one after it will already naturally be set apart. Anyway, I really enjoy your writing (it’s quirky and relatable).

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  4. I can’t walk in flip flops. They slide around and I’m so wobbly that the rest of me soon lands on the floor where only my feet were supposed to be. Whichever dog stole my other flip flop probably did me a favor.

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    • I don’t know where to put my feet when I walk in them and they give me a sore place between the two toes. They don’t even flip flap with me, they just stay fixed. Not my sort of thing either.

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  5. I used to find flip-flops challenging to walk in, but now I have no problem. I think mostly because I’ve developed a callous between my toes so I don’t feel pain anymore. Running in them, however, is still quite difficult. >.<

    Wonderful post! I can always rely on your posts to cheer me up when I'm having a bad day! =]

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  6. I live in flip-flops as long as the weather allows. I wish I could wear them all year round. I probably look ridiculous at 60 years of age still wearing them, but I don’t care. I hate wearing shoes, and these are as close as I can get to being shoeless. I am sorry your new shoes didn’t work for you, because they are lovely.

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