Your personal sculptor is carving a person, thing or event from the last year of your life. What’s the statue of and what makes it so significant?
“What do you think Mrs. Human? Seems to me that Gatto Michelangelo captured my wonderful sleek body well.”
Nera the cat was awaiting my answer.
“Uh, sorry Nera, I do not quite understand. Who is Gatto Michelangelo and what is that model of a black cat doing next to your cat cushion in front of the photo of Garfield.?”
“A model of a black cat!!! That is me in my full beauty Mrs. Human. As I live, I, me and myself. I think the great master captured my aura very well. Gatto Michelangelo is the artist for sculpturing feline figures, the best. He made a special price as he recogised my feline beauty.”
“Just a minute Nera, this object cost money? I think you had better explain.”
“There is nothing to explain Mrs. Human. I was busy with my catpad and found his web site. He is the artist for felines. All I had to do was send a photo via Internet, and pay in advance. I found your credit card and did the financial details using my CatPal account. No problem: the statue arrived today by Federal Express. Of course, it did cost a little more by using a courier service, but you have to be careful with such fragile goods. They could break, especially in the catmas post.”
“Is that your statue Nera made by the one and only Gatto Michelangelo. He really did a good job, but how comes that everything is so slim and streamlined. I thought you sent a realistic photo as your model.”
Tabby, Nera’s litter sister was now examining the figure.
“You mean I paid for this work of feline sculpture?” I was feeling quite annoyed. “And since when do you have your own CatPal account Nera.?”
“That was the easy bit Mrs. Human. It was advertised in Pawbook to join. All I had to do was fill in the details and find a sponser. I used your name and it seems that you were credit worthy.”
“You mean I financed this object?”
“It is not an object, but a work of art. Hisssss, Tabby stop sniggering behind your paw. This is a serious matter. It shows my wonderful body as it is this year, I think he has captured the sparkles in my eyes very well. You are all just jealous.”
“No, sorry Nera, but I do not think so. I have no problems in walking through the cat flap, but it seems that you have to sort give an energetic push to enter our home. How old was the photo you sent the great master. Must have been a kitten photo before your figure started to expand.”
“Tabby you are asking for a swipe of my paw.”
“All we need now is to hear the bit about it all being fluff and not fat.”
“It is fluff, and stop laughing. I find it looks very good next to the photo of Garfield with his pawprint. I might even become famous as a cat model.”
“Dream on Nera” was Tabby’s remark.
“And I am supposed to pay for this black china object. Nera, I think you went a little too far this time. The catpad was paid for with my credit card, as well as your Garfield fan club subscription. I really must agree with Tabby, it is not such a good resemblance.”
“It’s true Nera, but it is quite a significant statue. It shows how you could be if you ate just a little bit less.”
“Nera, stop scratching Tabby, that is not very nice. Tabby do not retaliate by biting Nera’s ear. Felines cool down.”
“What’s that cat figure doing on the table. Looks like that feline that does the television advertisements for that special energy food, the food you can eat as much as you like, but you stay agile.”
Fluffy, the youngest feline had arrived.
“Fluffy, that is my statue. It shows how I am. It is a pièce de résistance made by the one and only Gatto Michelangelo.”
“Errr, Nera, you mean it is you? Is this Gatto whatever short sighted, or did he lose his glasses?”
“Felines that is now enough. I now have fur all over the carpet. Stop fighting. Nera you will remove this unique statue of a slimline cat. According to the bill, it seems you will have tuna fish restrictions to your diet for the next few months, and there will be no extra goodies in between meals.”
“But, Mrs. Human”
“No buts, I have made my decision. Your catpad will be locked away.”
Nera walked off in a huff. Did I hear Tabby say to Fluffy that when Tabby’s portrait arrives, painted by the famous Picasso Chat, it will be hdden under the feline cushion until the fuss dies down???